the smuggler’s bible

Captain Erasmus Breechloader


Captain Erasmus Breechloader gives it ten minutes and counts his remaining space marines again.

Five, now. OK, that’s a little better.

He says, “Listen up, Squad,” then pauses with his thumb still holding the radio talk switch. Let those fuckers sweat for a minute. “We got a ping in the cafeteria, better send somebody down to check it out.”

“Just one? Are you kidding me?”

“Just one, Sergeant.”

It would be stupidly easy to flush the creature out of the ventilation shafts with the spaceship’s fire-suppression system—but competent men don’t get promoted, and Captain Erasmus Breechloader has ambitions.