the smuggler’s bible


Johnsie sits bolt upright at three in the morning with a business idea—a gift from god.

“We’ll put somebody in people’s yards,” she says later over margaritas, “way back in the bushes. In a deer blind where they can look out for squatches.”


“Sasquatches. If they see one, they hit a button or something. I dunno.”

“I am far from convinced, as I’m sure the general public also will be. Nobody’s scared of squatches in their yard.”

“Ah, but that’s the beauty of it.” Johnsie grins. “They will be as soon as we start offering to catch them.”