the smuggler’s bible


“All right,” Alborz says, stretching and jogging in place. “Potions. Let’s do this. Big ideas.”

He runs a finger along the books of alchemical processes stacked on his workbench. “Transmutation, boring! Amalgamation, boring! Catholiconization,” he mutters, “now there’s a moneymaker.”

Hours boil away while Alborz tends his cauldron, tipping in active ingredients and gently stirring the frothing mixture. For flavor, he picks at random from the spice rack—ah, nutmeg, a true classic.

When it’s over he’s left with a flask of hooch strong enough to melt screws. Completely useless. But that’s okay! Potion day is all about having fun.