the smuggler’s bible



Transcript from security footage depicting personnel interaction with Inmate Theta-Nine (called “Josephine”)

Interviewer: Do you know why we’re having this talk today?

Theta-Nine: Inaudible

Interviewer: You especially should understand that ‘no reason’ is a nonsensical concept. Drink some coffee. How have you been sleeping?

Theta-Nine: They keep the lights on.

Interviewer: I understand that this was at your request.

Theta-Nine: Sure, but that doesn’t mean it’s peaceful. What is that? What are you writing?

Inmate retrieves clipboard

Theta-Nine: You bitch. I’ll show you ‘surly behavior.’

Interviewer: Inaudible

Interviewer: Josephine, put the chair down.

Loud banging; footage ends