the smuggler’s bible

King Rience

Everybody has their hobbies. King Rience likes to collect other kings’ beards and wear them on his clothes.

Look, he isn’t dumb. He expects the practice will ruffle some feathers—especially since his donation requests end with “or else” and a gauntlet hitting the floor. What he doesn’t expect is a nighttime commando raid while he visits his girlfriend.

“Fellas, come on. This is really not very chivalrous.”

“Quiet, villain.”

“Are you serious? You just killed like forty dudes each.”

The knights laugh and take him to the dungeon. Almost everybody agrees that the world is way less creepy afterward.